Casshern Quotes

"Because there is death, there is life." - Casshern (anime) episode 2

Part VI

"Who's stupid now, Molly? Huh? Who's stupid now?! And now for a quick nap."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Gawd, is she snoring, or trying to throw up her lunch?"-random friend
"Wow, I love this job. They're all sleeping!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Serena... Do you ever think before you talk?"-Luna
"Oh, God, glass! Oh, I'm fine."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Freaking heels!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Riiight... Well, I'm out of here."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"So long as you're not a blatant f*cking homosexual this time, because that last effort was absolutely abysmal."-Queen Beryl
"So how will you fail this time?"-Queen Beryl
"I will use something the humans call 'a computer', where they view things like YouTube and Facebook, and... PornoTube."-Jadeite
"Is that those things Jesus did? Like with the bread and fish? Is Jesus gonna come, is he gonna make food?"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"What the f*ck do I care about geography? All the bad guys attack Japan anyway, it's not like I'm going anywhere."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"She might be from the Negaverse. Or I could be completely wrong... but I'm running Window Vista, so I have to be right."-Moon Intelligence System
"That's one of those things you think, but don't actually say."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Here we go; We need to go north, east, north, south-west, east-north. So, uh... that way."-Amy (Sailor Mercury)
"If you're gonna wish for something, at least wish for something that will help us!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Bulimia; zero the calories, twice the flavor!"-Serena/Sailor Moon (this was said in the Sailor Says section, so it could be either)
"Ooh, Sailor V goes to Hollywood! Can I borrow this Sailor V comic? I love Sailor V. She's Sailor-tastic!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Sorry, were you talking again?"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"What the f*** is this, huh?! This is the second scene to the episode... We're usually the opening skit!"-Queen Beryl
"i r super strong!"-Jadeite
"I love the screams of children!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"I'm pretending this horsie is Tuxedo Mask!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"This is no time to be fantasizing about a boy that you never talk to."-Luna
"Sit down and shut up."-Luna
"You wanna have fun, huh? Well, so do I. But instead my life is a miserable pit of despair! But you don't see me complaining!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Holy crap. Quick, Raye, use your voice to scare it away!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"All of our animals are magical robots."-Neverland Princess
"I think this woman is evil... And not the good kind."-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Let's split up. Serena, go with Raye, and I'll go with the nerd. K, bye."-Luna
"She's too nice! I don't like it!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"He's not a furrie! Don't pressure him!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Stop ruining other people's joy!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Hey... I get it. That's actually funny. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ah, God, it hurts to laugh!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"God, it hurts to laugh!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"The rose stopped the planes?! Plot hole!"- said by Sailor Moon, Mars, and maybe Mercury together Actually, the rose stopping the planes was no plot hole. In the dubbed show, Tuxedo Mask's rose was mainly an "attack" that created something similar to a shield.
"Oh, God! The beautiful nature! It burns with the fire of a thousand suns!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Why the hell are we outside? I wanna go shopping."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Even though I've never met you before, I'm gonna tell you about my sorrows."-Mr. Baxster
"I'm going to have an exastenchal moment in the middle of the street."-Luna
"Darien?! What are you doing touching my pussy?!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Oooh! His 80s jogging uniform sets a fire in my soul!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Everything is ruled by the stars. The movement of the stars rules everything. The ruling of everything is by the stars. Those stars, they rule. Oh, I feel it, Mr. Baxster. You've reached your energy peak. Rule me, baby... by the stars."-Nephlite
"Aw! Bitch, when I say you jump, you jump!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"They came to my temple, where I accidentally nearly murdered that fat bitch. Ya know, that one where everyone was disappearing? But don't worry, that doesn't happen anymore."-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"I study ways to sacrifice all our patrons to Satan."-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"He's into fulfilling the black pit of with the screams of sacrificial lambs?"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"I'm so mad... but I'm not gonna actually do anything about it."-Mr. Baxster
"Oh, God. This plot was killing me."-Nephlite
"Ohhh! Those nuts are mine!"-Random construction worker covered by biting squirrels
"F**king pokemon."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"Dark Crystal! I command you to show me the crystals one at a time throughout the next seven episodes!"-Zoisite
"Listen, Zoisite, I want to commend you on your retrieval of the first crystal. But don't get a big head. There are six more and you're doomed for failure. It's the fate of being a bad guy, you see. Just a... plot element, ya know."-Queen Beryl
"Now, crystal, show me the next target! A priest? Are we allowed to do this? I don't want the Vatican comin' after us or something."-Zoisite
"See, Molly? You just don't learn. Melvin and I come over and you give us something to drink, but no goddamn cookies again! I mean, seriously, all your manners go out the window when you get depressed. I get it. Your boyfriend died. Get over it!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"According to Wikipedia, the Negaverse is after the seven Pride Crystals for the next six episodes."-Luna
"No, it gives them less energy, they're on an energy diet. Of course it gives them more energy!"-Luna
"Over a millenia ago, the Moon Kingdom was under attack by the evil Negaverse. And then some stuff happened, and shit blew up, and you all went into these little bubbles. And blah, blah, blah-"(those blahs go on for a while, so let's stop there)-Luna
"No matter how smart I am, I'm still the most useless one here."-Amy (Sailor Mercury)
"Am I the only one who thinks it's weird we take orders from a talking cat?"-Lita/Leo (Sailor Jupiter)
"Oh, God! She's sooo boring! It makes me wanna claw out my face, just so I know I'm still alive!"-Raye (Sailor Mars)
"Only now are the warriors being reborn- which is terribly convenient, if you ask me."-Luna
"I think you were falsely labeled as the smartest scout."-Lita/Leo (Sailor Jupiter)
"Excuse me. Oh, you're a priest! Uh... Nah, too easy."-Molly
"Jesus, space cats are creepy."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"As much as I find Molly a liability, you really should help her."-Luna
"Thank God for plot holes!"-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"How can it be so hard to find a floating orange crystal, dammit!"-Zoisite
"I'm Bobo the Boxing Jehovah's Witness."-unnamed priest
"Lita! God, never heard of public transportation?"-Luna
"Finders, keepers! I'm keeping this locket that he dropped. Totally my property now."-Serena (Sailor Moon)
"This show is so f**ked up."-Luna
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "You can read?!"
Luna: "Serena, if I can talk, of course I can read!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "You can talk?!"
===
Random friend number... something: "Gawd, is she snoring, or trying to throw up her lunch?"
Random friend number something after that: "I think both."
===
Luna: "This pen can disguise you into whatever you want."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Ooh! Can I write with it?"
Luna: "No."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "But it's a... pen."
Luna: "No!"
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Wow, I love this job. They're all sleeping!"
Luna: "Serena... Do you ever think before you talk?"
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "In the name of the Moon, I will punish you!"
Jadeite: "Lots of pretty words, Miss Moon. But is that all they are... pretty words?"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Riiight... Well, I'm out of here."
===
Jadeite: "I have a new plan to gather energy, my queen."
Beryl: "So long as you're not a blatant f*cking homosexual this time, because that last effort was absolutely abysmal."
===
Beryl: "So how will you fail this time?"
Jadeite: "I will use something the humans call 'a computer', where they view things like YouTube and Facebook, and... PornoTube."
Beryl: "That sounds very interesting... especially that last one..."
Jadeite: "Why? So you can download more Kelly Clarkson songs?"
Beryl: "Yeah... yeah, that's it..."
===
Luna: "You reap what you sew."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "I hate sewing."
Luna: "Serena, it was a proverb."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Is that those things Jesus did? Like with the bread and fish? Is Jesus gonna come, is he gonna make food?"
===
Luna: "Shut up and study. You need to learn about things like geography."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "What the f*ck do I care about geography? All the bad guys attack Japan anyway, it's not like I'm going anywhere."
===
Moon Computer's Intelligence System: "Here's a girl I've been sta-waaatching for a while now."
Luna: "Who is this?"
Moon Computer's Intelligence System: "I dunno, but she might be from the Negaverse. Or I could be completely wrong... but I'm running Window Vista, so I have to be right."
Luna: "Well, I'm completely sold."
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Let's go, Mercury!"
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Let's clean her clock!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "See, Amy... that's one of those things you think, but don't actually say."
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Hey, where did you get that?"
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Luna's butt."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Yeah? There's where I got my pen. And a few other things..."
===
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Ok, here we go. We need to go north, east, north, south-west, east-north. So, uh... that way."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "There she is! Haa- ah. I can't move my legs."
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Oh no, I can't move either! I wish Luna were here."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "The cat? What the hell could she do? If you're gonna wish for something, at least wish for something that will help us."
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Ooh, Sailor V goes to Hollywood! Can I borrow this Sailor V comic? I love Sailor V. She's Sailor-tastic!"
Raye (Sailor Mars): "No! I haven't even read that Sailor V comic yet. You can't take my Sailor V away!"
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Wait... Sailor? You mean like a Sailor Scout?"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Sorry, were you talking again?"
===
Raye (Sailor Mars): "I love the screams of children!"
Luna: "I'm ignoring that."
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "I wanna have fun."
Raye (Sailor Mars): "You wanna have fun, huh? Well, so do I. But instead my life is a miserable pit of despair! But you don't see me complaining, huh?!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Actually..."
===
Raye (Sailor Mars): "Hey... Serena... Doesn't he kind of look like Tuxedo Mask?"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "No way! Tuxedo Mask is way too cool, and way not a pedophile like this asshole is!"
Darien (Tuxedo Mask): "I can hear you."
===
Luna: "Careful, we're hallucenating."
Raye (Sailor Mars): "Wouldn't be the first time!"
===
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "Shut up, guys. I'm here to visit my friend, Mr. Baxster. Hello, Mr. Baxster."
Mr. Baxster: "Oh, Amy, you're lookin' fresh and supple today."
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "What?"
===
Mr. Baxster: "And I see you brought your friends. Even though I've never met you before, I'm gonna tell you about my sorrows."
Raye (Sailor Mars) *thinking*: "Why does he think we care?"
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Darien?! What are you doing touching my pussy?!"
Darien (Tuxedo Mask): "It smells like you."
Serena (Sailor Moon): "We're still talking about the cat, right?"
===
Andrew: "So, how did you and Serena meet, ay?"
Raye (Sailor Mars): "They came to my temple, where I accidentally nearly murdered that fat bitch. Ya know, that one where everyone was disappearing? But don't worry, that doesn't happen anymore."
Andrew: "Oh, ay... What, uh... do you do up there, ay?"
Raye (Sailor Mars): "I study ways to sacrifice all our patrons to Satan."
Andrew: "Ay...? You should talk to Darien. I think he'd be more interested."
Raye (Sailor Mars): "Oooh! He's into fulfilling the black pit of with the screams of sacrificial lambs?"
Andrew: "Uh... yeah, ay."
===
Zoisite: "Dark Crystal! I command you to show me the crystals one at a time throughout the next seven episodes!"
Homing Crystal: "K."
===
Mystery Princess (Serena) *in Golem's voice*: "Tuxedo Mask... my precious..."
Darien (Tuxedo Mask): "Show me your face!"
Mystery Princess (Serena): "No!"
Darien (Tuxedo Mask): "Then show me your boobs!"
Mystery Princess (Serena): "Maybe later."
Darien (Tuxedo Mask): "Now, please?"
Mystery Princess (Serena): "Well, okay."
===
Luna: "Yes, well, according to Wikipedia, the Negaverse is after the seven Pride Crystals for the next six episodes."
Raye (Sailor Mars): "What happened to them sucking everyone's energy?"
Lita/Leo (Sailor Jupiter) *says semi-sarcastically*: "Maybe the crystals give them more energy?"
Luna: "No, it gives them less energy, they're on an energy diet. Of course it gives them more energy!"
===
Luna: "Over a millenia ago, the Moon Kingdom was under attack by the evil Negaverse. And then some stuff happened, and shit blew up, and you all went into these little bubbles. And blah, blah, blah-"(those blahs continue until the next Luna quotation I write in her)
Amy (Sailor Mercury): "No matter how smart I am, I'm still the most useless one here."
Lita/Leo (Sailor Jupiter): "Am I the only one who thinks it's weird we take orders from a talking cat?"
Raye (Sailor Mars): "Oh, God! She's sooo boring! It makes me wanna claw out my face, just so I know I'm still alive!"
Luna: "...And the seven warriors were locked in Queen Serenity's Silver Imperial Crystal. But then the Crystal blew up into these seven Rainbow Pride Crystals, for absolutely no reason. And they all flew to Earth, and only now are the warriors being reborn- which is terribly convenient, if you ask me."
===
Luna: "Serena! You just transformed in front of all of them!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Thank God for plot holes!"
===
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Oooh! What are you doing, putting me down in a position like this?"
*Tuxedo Mask jumps away*
Serena (Sailor Moon): "It's ok, I'll wait."
===
Luna: "Lita! God, never heard of public transportation?"
Lita/Leo (Sailor Jupiter): "Huh-hurrh... Shut up!"
===
Unnamed Priest: "Oh, Jesus, thank you for saving me!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "What?! No way! I saved-"
SMA's Jesus: "No, no, it's cool. You're welcome!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Aw, son of a bitch."
===
Luna: "Did you see that? Tuxedo Mask stole the Crystal!"
Serena (Sailor Moon): "Finders, keepers! I'm keeping this locket that he dropped. Totally my property now."
Luna: "This show is so f**ked up."
===

"How can you die when you're the Grim f**king Reaper?!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"My useless character senses are tingling."-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Go f**k a toaster, Urameshi!"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Mummy-Cyclops mad! Mummy-Cyclops no like Chris Crocker!"- Mummy-Cyclops, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Oh, come now, just because I'm the most intelligent member of this team doesn't always mean you have to your questions towards me."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I like muffins!"-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Have you ever watched a dub of an anime, and then watched a completely different dub of the same show and thought it didn't sound right? Well, the energies of the Netherworld do that pretty much, except it also affects the person's character."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Alright; fists? Check. Spirit Gun? Check. Okay, now let's raid this... hospital? Alright, whatever."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Look out, Yusuke, those guys are pushing her around and treating her like dirt. Looks like you have some competition after all."-Botan, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"My name's Kazuma Kuwabara, and I'm the star of this episode!"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Why do I have the sudden urge to re-kill Urameshi?"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Well, I suppose I should give you some inane moral test in order to make me look like an ass, and have you prove yourselves to any following spirits of former rivals you may have. Let's see... I got it! You're not allowed to fight for an entire week. And you must make more that 50 points on our next test... which is still technically failing, but we have very low standards here."-Mr. Akashi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"And they said those child-stalking classes were a waste of money."-Mr. Akashi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Man, I really need to find something better to do with my free time. Maybe I'll take up knitting."-Mr. Akashi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Hey, Kuwabara, I copied the Answer Key for ya."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"How does it feel to be beaten up by a possessed girl?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"I swear to ass, I'm gonna kick your God."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Logic and anime don't mix. You know that, Yusuke."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Good news, Suiichi. Thanks to whatever the hell I just did, your mother has recovered one-hundred percent. You'll get your bill in the mail."-random doctor, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"For the last time, I'm not gay. I'm as straight as Ricky Martin's sparkling abs... Wait! I mean...!"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Yes. Now that I have the Artifacts of Darkness, I can use their power to get my show back!" (pause) "And murder people."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Well, at least I'll die without regrets. Oh, wait..."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Ah! My eye! My doctor told me to get blood in it!"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"You're welcome. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go bleed somewhere."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Man, I suck at this."-Yusuke Urameshi
"And now, for a brief moment of hubris before killing you." (Yusuke's spirit gun blast hits Hiei from behind) "How did I not see that coming?"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"I'm going to kill you. But first, I'm going to take off my shirt!"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Now you are completely under my control, Hiei! How many people wish they could say that, hm? But I digress. Kill your friends!"-Reiko, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I'll be fine, once I get my dragon back."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Right. I'm confused as hell right now, so I'm just gonna go fight."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Great. I'm alone until dawn. What the hell can an all-powerful Netherworld God do to pass the time in this damn city?"-Yakumo, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Let me guess, all these sites are conviently located in one city in Japan."-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Kuwabara POW- oh, wow, that's an arm."-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"So like I was telling Ted the other day, for a job where all ya really gotta do is break a few shrines, the perks are pretty sweet."-Random Pointless Demon, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I work for Spirit World... I don't have any pride!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Ahh! My body's all weak and floaty!"(a growing purple light starts at Hinageshi's feet) "Ooo... pretty." (the light starts to envelope her body) "Uh-oh! Bad touch."-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Oh, fine, let's just post-pone our plans to bring back the Netherworld so you can go take a friggin' nap!"-Yakumo, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"This is why we're going to die."-Yakumo, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"As soon as I dislodge this parking break from my spine, I'm gonna kick your ass."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"You know, I must say, this has been conveniently uneventful."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Good idea. Who doesn't enjoy a good Star Wars larp."-Majari, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Alright! This must the Heart site. Time to save the world, just long as I don't get distrac- oo, bubbles."-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Heh heh heh heh... That's right, I just kicked the crap out of a 12-year-old!"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"If you think I'm as stupid as Kuwabara, you're wrong! I'm a whole new kind of stupid! Waait..."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Amnesia fading!"-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Hey Kurama, check it out, I'm a blood fountain. Oh, and ruuuuun!"-Kuronue, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Nobody remembers Chin Po!"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Just tell me one thing; do your fighting skills match your rapping skills?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Oh, this guy is so f*cking dead."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Farts are funny, heh heh. Peep."-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"If you make a fart pun, I'm going to stab you in the eye with your own finger."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I'm off. I must... wander."-Chin Po, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"The Earth Site's been destroyed, and now it's leaking out Netherworld energy. If the other four sites are broken, then the Netherworld can be reformed. Can I have a pretzel?"-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I drawed a squirrel! It goes peep, peep, peep... peep."-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"You're an idiot who likes playing with his monkey."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Seriously, do you even know how to read that ma- is that a coloring book?"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"On the plus side, she stopped talking."-Yakumo, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I figured she'd either take her to Genkai's like I asked, or bury her alive somewhere. Either way, I don't have to deal with either of them."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I guess the safety of humanity can wait until morning."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"There are five Elemental Sites in the Human World that seals the Netherworld's power. And they represent Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and Heart. It's a lot like summoning Captain Planet. Only instead of Captain Planet, it's the Netherworld, and instead of fighting pollution, it kills people."-Hinageshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"You may be fast, but I've got a gun!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Quit your damn soliloquizing. We're going."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"I dislike you with great intensity."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"That was... the worst pun... ever."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Seriously. If you wanted to die there are plenty of ways. Like jumping in front of a bus, or picking a fight with Tony Jaa."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Just saying, you demons really don't like clothes."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"I couldn't resist the Star Wars reference. Oh, and your girlfriend's turning into a demon."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Oh, f*** all of you."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Your overconfidence is your weakness."-Yusuke, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Keiko's psycho and really possessive. Haven't you ever wondered why no other girls talk to me?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Now all he has to do is study until he's not completely retarded."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"It's anime law. Any character who's in a series for more than five episodes is going to have a back-story."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"You're just afraid of being killed, you big baby."-Botan, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"I like my way of saying it better."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Welcome to Japan, everything's f**cked up here."-Mr. Akashi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"How the f*ck do ya think I'm doing? In the past two months, I've been hit by a car, lit on fire, and nearly killed by a friggin' Ivan Drago wanna-be."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"He sure has a lot of blood."-Botan, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Holy sh*t. You took his head clean off."-Botan, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Or she could just be ass-retarded."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Yakumo, the Netherworld King, eventually became bored, and made war with the Spirit World."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Something usually happens when we run around randomly like this."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Kuwabara, why are you just standing there? Do something!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"When you get to Spirit World, tell Koenma I said 'f**k you!'"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Why is it everybody always stares at me when I walk through a door?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Wow! That guy has horns! I could make a real bad pun right here, but I'll choose not to."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Wow, I'm gone for three days, and Kuwabara's already getting picked on by some freak with horns. Shocker."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"They call me Yusuke. And this is called kicking your ass! That was a kick-ass one-liner. I'm gonna have to write that one down."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Welp, time for plan Get-the-f**k-out-of-here."-Thug possessed by Jihaki, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Heh heh heh... Nothing can stop me now! Aah! A pot hole! My one weakness!"-Thug possessed by Jihaki, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Well that was fun. Now where's his wallet?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"By George! It stunk in there."-Jihaki, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Here's a tip: Try not to fly in circles."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Damn it, I hate Spirit World."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Well, if they can kill your father's A team, then what the hell can I do about it? I mean, what do you expect me to do, yell at them til they give it back? I mean, I know I'm good at yelling, but-"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Well I was just thinking, that now that we all got what we want, we should go our seperate ways. Toodles."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Damn, what did I do to make him leave? Was it my breath? Did I not kill enough people?"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"My poems are gold, you ass! Have you never seen my show on DTV, Demon Television?"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"That's the last time I play soccer in the street..."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Oh, come on! 'Surprised To Be Dead'? Of course I'm surprised to be dead! No wonder Cartoon Network dropped this show with titles like that."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Hey, give me back my body! I need that to beat people up like other positive role models!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Does anyone want to explain to me why there's a giant talking rock?"-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Anyone else getting kind of a deliverance sort of vibe?"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"I'm at where I'm always at... DOING YOUR F**KING DIRTY WORK!"-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Where the hell is that voice coming from? And why am I flying? Man, that's the last time I accept Kool-Aid from my art teacher."-Yusuke Urameshi, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Check it out, I'm a blood fountain."-Kuronue, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"Of course, there always has to be a conflict."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho: Poltergeist Report the Abridged Movie by Lanipator
"You know, I'd say I'm disappointed, but in order for that to be true, I'd have to be surprised."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Oh, boy. A Micheal Jackson joke. How original."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Great. Now I have retard in surround sound."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"Now that's what I call flower power." (pause) "Shut up, Urameshi."-Kuwabara, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"No! No more laugh track."-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"If you make one more stupid comparative joke, I'm going to kill you."-Kurama, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"May I please kill him now?"-Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged by Lanipator
"And so, another crisis is averted. But how does Yusuke get his body back? Find out... sometime, on Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged."-Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged Narrator
===
George: "Master Koenma, we have a big problem!"
Koenma: "I'll say we do, dude! The power went out, and now the only TV that's working is this one! And I can't change the friggin' channel, man! I can't get anything; no topless car washing, topless volleyball, PBS... Nothing!
George: "Um, Sir... That's a window."
Koenma: "Dude, I don't care who made it, just fix it."
===
Yusuke: "Just great, now it's it's starting to rain."
(an unconcious girl with tattered clothes falls toward the roof)
Yusuke: "Huh? Alright! Now this is my kind of rai- Oh. It's just Botan. Wake up!"
Botan: "Yusuke, Spirit World is in danger. You have to find Hinageshi, and hurry, or I'll... die"
Yusuke: "That raises so many questions I don't even know where to start. One, who's Hinageshi? Two, what happened? Three, how can you die when you're the Grim f**king Reaper?! And, of course, let's not forget four, why should I give a damn?!"
===
Kuwabara: "So you really left Botan with Keiko?"
Yusuke: "Yeah. I figured she would either take her to Genkai's like I asked, or bury her alive somewhere. Either way, I don't have to deal with either of 'em."
===
Kuwabara: "Where the hell are we going, Urameshi?"
Yusuke: "I un'no, but something usually happens when we run around randomly like this."
===
Kuwabara: "My useless character senses are tingling."
Yusuke: "If they're on you, shouldn't they be going off 24/7?"
===
Kuwabara: "Name's Kazuma Kuwabara, the bad-ass with the sword."
Hinageshi: "Nice to meet you, Kuwahara."
Kuwabara: "Um, it's Kuwabara."
Hinageshi: "That's what I said, Kuwahara."
Kuwabara: "KUWABARA!"
Hinageshi: "Kuwahara!"
Kuwabara: "BARA!"
Hinageshi: "Hara!"
Kuwabara: "Dammit, my name is pronounced KUWAHARA-"
*Hinageshi blinks at him*
Kuwahara: "I don't like you."
===
Kuwabara: "You're kidding me! You mean Botan actually made it all the way here with Keiko?!"
Genkai: "Yeah, I found the stupid bitch trying to bury her in my forest."
===
Kuwabara: "What's the Netherworld?"
Kurama: "Oh, come now, just because I'm the most intelligent member of this team doesn't always mean you have to your questions towards me. Why don't you ask Genkai, right Genkai?"
Genkai: "Go f**k yourself."
Kurama: "Sigh."
Hinageshi: "Oo! I can do it, let me tell em!"
Kurama: "Very well then, much appreciated."
Hinageshi: "Ok, so... um. This one time, there was this guy, and he was all like, evil and mean and stuff, and he was all like, gurr, I'm the king of the Nethar Wurld, gerr I hate Sprit World and he was all like gonna take over the SPirut werld, but then king Enmuh was all like-"
Kurama: "Nevermind, I'll do it. Anyway, the Netherworld once co-existed alongside the Human World, Demon World, and Spirit World thousands of years ago."
Yusuke: "Bet that takes you back, doesn't it, grandma? ARHH!"
Genkai: "Continue."
Kurama: "Yakumo, the Netherworld King, eventually became bored, and made war with the Spirit World in an effort to corrupt it. But King Enma managed to banish the evil king, and seal away the power of the Netherworld."
===
Yusuke: "You keep saying 'corrupt.' What do you mean?"
Kurama: "Have you ever watched a dub of an anime, and then watched a completely different dub of the same show and thought it didn't sound right? Well, the energies of the Netherworld do that pretty much, except it also affects the person's character."
Kuwabara: "Well, I guess that explains what's wrong with Hinageshi then, doesn't it?"
Hinageshi: "I like muffins!"
Kurama: "Or she could just be ass-retarded."
===
(screen shows Yusuke's point-blank Spirit Gun/Fingerbang shot to Goki's head)
Botan: "Holy sh*t. You took his head clean off."
Yusuke: "I'd call it an improvement."
Botan: "He sure has a lot of blood."
(gushing sound)
Yusuke: "Not anymore."
===
Koenma: "Let's see how my new Spirit Detective's doin'."
Yusuke: "Aah, I can't feel my legs."
Koenma: "Dammit."
===
Botan: "Well, Yusuke, how are you doing?"
Yusuke: "How the f*ck do ya think I'm doing? In the past two months, I've been hit by a car, lit on fire, and nearly killed by a friggin' Ivan Drago wanna-be."
===
Yusuke: "This Spirit Detective job sucks. I mean, seriously, what am I getting out of this anyway?"
Botan: "Your own gratification that you made the world safe from demons."
Yusuke: "Dammit."
===
Kuwabara: "You can't do that! It's un-American!"
Mr. Akashi: "Welcome to Japan, everything's f**cked up here."
===
Kurama: "Don't worry. I haven't come here to fight. I rather dislike violence."
Yusuke: "Thank f*cking god."
===
Botan: "Yusuke! Why would you give him three days?"
Yusuke: "I don't know. I guess I trust him, I guess."
Botan: "No you don't. You're just afraid of being killed, you big baby."
Yusuke: "I like my way of saying it better."
===
Yusuke: "So what exactly are we doing here?"
Kurama: "This is the hospital where my human mother, Shiori, is staying."
Yusuke: "Human mother? I thought you were a demon."
Kurama: "I am. And yet, I'm not."
Yusuke: "Aw, crap. Here comes the back-story."
Kurama: "Sorry, Yusuke, it's anime law. Any character who's in a series for more than five episodes is going to have a back-story. Anyway, before I came to Human World, I was known as Yoko, the spirit fox. Unfortunately, during a Naruto cosplay gone horribly wrong, I was mortally wounded and forced to take refuge in the Human World. I took up the guise of Suiichi Minamino, and waited for my energy to recover so I could return to Demon World. But then something happened. My Mother became deathly ill."
Yusuke: "What does she have?"
Kurama: "Piccoloitis."
Yusuke: "Huh?"
Kurama: "It's a very rare ailment that causes normally evil people to change their ways, and care about something weaker than them."
===
Kuwabara: "Well guys, I'm gonna go home and study from tomorrow's test. I'm gonna take this way back to save time. See ya."
The Kuwabara cronie with actual hair: "Uh, Kuwabara, doesn't that path lead right past those guys we just beat up?"
Kuwabara: "Oh, don't worry. I'm sure they've forgotten by now."
Yusuke: "Wow. Is he really that stupid?"
Botan: "Yep."
===
Yusuke: "Well, at least now all he has to do is study until he's not completely retarded."
Kuwabara: (viewing a shelf of books) "What the hell are these things?"
Yusuke: "He's doomed."
===
Botan: "It seems they're gonna let Kurama off with just a warning."
Yusuke: "What do you mean, 'a warning'? Why would they do that?"
Botan: "Well he didn't really do any harm, and he did give the mirror back."
Yusuke: "Well, I guess that makes sense. Aside from the fact that he broke into the Spirit World vault, killed who-know's how many guards, and provided two powerful items to two powerful demons who don't intend to give them back."
===
Yusuke: "You Spirit World people really piss me off. I mean, I almost got killed trying to get that ball back from that ogre-"
Botan: "Goki."
Yusuke: "And who knows what that other guy-"
Botan: "Hiei."
Yusuke: "I don't care what their names are!"
===
Yusuke: "Don't you get it? Keiko's psycho and really possessive. Haven't you ever wondered why no other girls talk to me?"
Botan: "You're kidding... right?"
===
Yusuke: "Wait, you're Hiei? You're like four foot nothin'."
Botan: "With his hair."
Hiei: "Hrrr... Haven't you ever heard the expression "size doesn't matter"?
Yusuke: "Well, that's just what girls say to their boyfriends who have really small-"
Botan: "Yusuke!"
Yusuke: "What? It's true."
===
Hiei: "Can't you see how outmatched you are?"
Yusuke: "Your overconfidence is your weakness."
Hiei: "And your faith in your friends is yours."
Yusuke: "What the hell are you talking about? I'm the only fighter here."
Hiei: "I know, but I couldn't resist the Star Wars reference. Oh, and your girlfriend's turning into a demon."
===
Hiei: "Fine, you cocky bastard, maybe it's time I showed you my full power."
(Hiei throws away his cloak as an attempt at dramatic effect)
Yusuke: "Why do you have to take off your shirt?"
Hiei: "Why not?"
Yusuke: "Just saying, you demons really don't like clothes."
===
(Kurama takes sword thrust meant for Yusuke in his stomach)
Kurama: "Ow."
Yusuke: "Kurama, what the hell are you doing?"
Hiei: "Seriously. If you wanted to die there are plenty of ways. Like jumping in front of a bus, or picking a fight with Tony Jaa."
===
Yusuke: "I guess that's what they call eye-rony."
Hiei: "That was... the worst pun... ever."
===
Yusuke: "So how ya doin' Kurama?"
Kurama: "I really need to go to the hospital. I'm losing a lot of blood."
Yusuke: "That's right, hang in there, Champ."
Kurama: "I dislike you with great intensity."
===
Kuwabara: "Why'd it get so foggy all of a sudden?"
Kurama: "I believe I know why."
Hinageshi: "Oo! Is it pirates?"
Kurama: "No."
Hinageshi: "Aliens?"
Kurama: "No."
Hinageshi: "Kuronue?"
Kurama: "Nc- wait, what?"
===
False Kuronue: "It's time we finished what we started by that shrine."
Kurama: "You know, we could have finished it right then and there, if you hadn't run away."
False Kuronue: "Silence, Kurama. That was a tactical retreat."
Kurama: "How was that tactical? I was on my knees, and you could have plowed that steel into my face and finished it then."
Kuwabara: "Wait, what are they talking about?"
===
Kurama: "Kuronue, I never properly thanked you for your sacrifice. And it's at this time that I'd-"
Hiei: "Quit your damn soliloquizing. We're going."
Kurama: "Hiei... f*** off."
Hiei: "Whatever. But you better hurry up. Wins a fight, thinks he's invincible..."
Kurama: "Anyway, Kuronue, I-"
Yusuke: "Kurama! Hurry up!"
Kurama: "Oh, f*** all of you."
===
Kurama: "Oh, there you are, Hiei. Are you alright?"
Hiei: "I'll be fine, once I get my dragon back."
(Darkness Dragon comes home to Hiei's left arm)
Hiei: "Nope, didn't help."
(Hiei drops like a stone)
Yusuke: "Hiei!"
Kuwabara: "Is he gonna be ok?"
Kurama: "Say something, Hiei!"
Hinageshi: "Peep."
Hiei: "Say that again, and I'll f***ing murder you!"
Yusuke: "Yep, he's fine. Let's keep moving."
===
Kurama: "Are you sure it's wise to hold him like that?"
Kuwabara: "Ah, he's out cold. Waz he gonna care?"
Hiei: "I am not! Put me down or I'll kill you!"
Kuwabara: "Oh, come on, Hiei, you're dead on your feet. Besides, it's not like I'm gonna drop you."
Hiei: "Yeah, like I trust you after what happened earlier!"
Kuwabara: "Oh, how was I supposed to know you were up there? Seriously, who stands on the top of a tree?"
Hiei: "Who punches down a tree?"
(long sigh from Kurama)
===
Yusuke: "You may be fast, but I've got a gun!"
Yakuma: "That's nice."
===
Genkai: "If they already took down Spirit World, why did they come here?"
Hinageshi: "Five Elemental Sites!"
Genkai: "I beg your pardon?"
Hinageshi: "There are five Elemental Sites in the Human World that seals the Netherworld's power. And they represent Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and Heart. It's a lot like summoning Captain Planet. Only instead of Captain Planet, it's the Netherworld, and instead of fighting pollution, it kills people."
===
Kurama: "I'm impressed, Hinageshi. That was actually quite clever."
Hinageshi: "Thanks, Kurama-ama-nama!"
Kurama: "And that put an end to that."
===
Kurama: "Hiei, have you been drinking again?"
Hiei: "No!"
(semi-long pause)
Hiei: "Alright, a little. Shut up!"
===
Yusuke: "Alright, so all we have to do is get to the Elemental Sites before the bad guys and we'll be just fine. So let's get goin'."
Kuwabara: "But it's dark out!"
Yusuke: "Fine. I guess the safety of humanity can wait until morning."
===
Kuwabara: "So you really left Botan with Keiko?"
Yusuke: "Yeah. I figured she'd either take her to Genkai's like I asked, or bury her alive somewhere. Either way, I don't have to deal with either of them."
===
Yakumo: "Yes... This place is perfect for ressurrecting the Netherworld. All we have to do is destroy the Elemental Sites and take back what was stolen from us. We can be Gods once again by dawn!"
Majari: "But I'm tired!"
Yakumo: "Oh, fine, let's just post-pone our plans to bring back the Netherworld so you can go take a friggin' nap!"
Majari: "Thanks, Boss."
(his three minions leave)
Yakumo: "Wait, I was being sarca-"
(Yakumo sighs)
Yakumo: "This is why we're going to die."
===
Yusuke: "Okay, Hinageshi, we've been running around this city for THREE HOURS now! Do you have any idea where we're going?"
Kuwabara: "Seriously, do you even know how to read that ma- is that a coloring book?"
Hinageshi: "I drawed a squirrel! It goes peep, peep, peep... peep."
===
Hinageshi: "I drawed a squirrel! It goes peep, peep, peep... peep. Earth Site go boom."
Yusuke: "What?"
Hinageshi: "Peep."
(a big purple explosion occurs)
Yusuke: "Oh, come on! What the hell is that?"
Hinageshi: "The Earth Site's been destroyed, and now it's leaking out Netherworld energy. If the other four sites are broken, then the Netherworld can be reformed. Can I have a pretzel?"
Yusuke: "No. Not before we save the world."
Hinageshi: "But I want a pretzel."
Kurama: "Later. For now, we have to split up. Yusuke, you head for the Fire Site. Kuwabara, you take care of Heart. As for me, I'll deal with Water."
Kuwabara: "Hey! Why am I stuck with Heart?"
Yusuke: "'Cause you're an idiot who likes playing with his monkey."
Kuwabara: "Fair enough."
===
Hinageshi: "Can I have a pretzel?"
Yusuke: "No. Not before we save the world."
Hinageshi: "But I want a pretzel."
Kurama: "Later."
===
Hinageshi: "Ahh! My body's all weak and floaty!"
(a growing purple light starts at Hinageshi's feet)
Hinageshi: "Ooo... pretty."
(the light starts to envelope her body)
Hinageshi: "Uh-oh! Bad touch. Eeeie!"
Yakumo: "On the plus side, she stopped talking. However, this girl is of no use to me."
Yusuke: "Bravo, genius. I figured that out twenty-four hours ago."
===
Yakumo: "So this worthless trash is with you then. Here, you can have her back."
Yusuke: "Nno, that's ok, I really don't-"
(Yakumo throws Hinageshi at Yusuke, straight out of her levitating state... Yusuke catches.)
Hinageshi: "Hi, Yusa-kay!"
===
Yakumo: "I'm sorry, did that hurt your pride?"
Yusuke: "If you must know, I work for Spirit World... I don't have any pride!"
===
Kurama: "Hello, Hiei. What are you doing here?"
Hiei: "Not going to your stupid party for stupid people, if that's what your asking!"
Kurama: "Hiei, have you been drinking again?"
Hiei: "No!"
(brief pause)
Hiei: "Alright, a little."
(another brief pause)
Hiei: "Shut up!"
===
Yusuke: "Just take me to the damn site!"
Hinageshi: "Hey, look, a doggie!"
Yusuke: "Focus."
Hinageshi: "Up there.''
(scene change to their new location, the afore-mentioned "Up there")
Yusuke: "Well, where is it?"
Hinageshi: "It's inside the 'sploding building."
Yusuke: "What exploding buildi-"
*suddenly the multi-level parking garage in front of them crashes apart*
Yusuke: "How do you do that?"
Hinageshi: "Do what?"
Yusuke: "Nevermind."
===
Chin Po: "Excuse me, is this the way to the mall? You see, I had this coupon for twenty-five cents off wandering shoes, and I was wondering if-"
Yusuke: "No."
Chin Po: "Very well then. I'm off. I must... wander."
===
Kurama: "You know, I must say, this has been conveniently uneventful."
Will-be False Kuronue: "I have taken your past."
Kurama: "Of course, there always has to be a conflict."
===
Kurama: "Who is it?"
Kuronue: "I'm insulted, Kurama. You mean you really don't remember your old partner?"
Kurama: "Youmi, I swear I di- oh, it's you. Hi Kuronue."
===
Kuwabara: "Actually, that reminds me; when exactly did the fifth site break? Hiei, did you break wi-"
Hiei: "If you make a fart pun, I'm going to stab you in the eye with your own finger."
Hinageshi: "Farts are funny, heh heh. Peep."
===
Hinageshi: "Peep."
Hiei: "And why the hell are we stuck with her?"
Kuwabara: "Well, Urameshi got stuck with her yesterday, so he just threw her at me and ran out to Genkai's place."
Hiei: "Lucky bastard."
===
Kuwabara: "Speaking of that energy, what the hell is going on? Why isn't the whole city freaking out?"
Kurama: "Isn't it obvious?"
Neighborhood Watch Commitee van's loudspeaker: "Attention everyone! This is the Neighborhood Watch Commitee, reminding everyone to ignore the ominious purple obelisk in the middle of the city. Thank you, and have a pleasent day. Yes, we're that damn good."
===
Yusuke: "Just tell me one thing; do your fighting skills match your rapping skills?"
Rando: "Hell yeah!"
Yusuke: "Oh thank God."
===
Hiei: "Nin'ty-nine bottles of beer on the wall-" *drunken hiccup* "ninety-nine bottles o' beer-"
Kurama: "Hiei, what the hell are you doing?"
Hiei: "What does it look like I'm doing?"
Kurama: "Hiei, shouldn't drink so much."
Hiei: "I'll get as want as I drunk a' be. You wouldn't understand, you didn't lose your show."
Kurama: "Well, rather than being such a whiny little bitch about it, why don't you just come up with a plan to get it back?"
Hiei: "You're right. And I have a plan so good I could puke!"
*puking noise is heard*
Kurama: "Indeed."
===
Kurama: "Amnesia fading!"
*sudden flashback to the real Kuronue's death*
Kuronue: "Hey Kurama, check it out, I'm a blood fountain. Oh, and ruuuuun!"
*flashforward to current scene*
Kurama: "Oh, this guy is so f*cking dead."
False Kuronue: "Die, Kurama!"
*Kurama runs the poser through with a bamboo blade*
===
Genkai: "Final match, Shaoran versus Yu-"
*Yusuke punches Shaoran*
Genkai: "-suke. Whatever, begin. I don't even care anymore."
===
Genkai: "I think I've seen this technique before."
Botan: "You mean, like, Shaoran might have stolen that technique from some psyhcic?"
Genkai: "No, that's not it. I'm just saying he's throwing fireballs. It's a very cliché anime technique."
===
Yusuke: "Man, why is it everybody always stares at me when I walk through a door? Oh, well. At least I got these glasses on, so nobody will know who I am."
Random nearby punk: "Hey, isn't that that dead kid, what's-his-name?"
Random nearby punk next to the first punk: "You mean Yusuke Urameshi?"
Yusuke: "Yep, I'm a master of disguise."
===
Botan: "It is as I thought."
Yusuke: "Huh? The weird Klan lady?"
Botan: "I'm supposed to be a fortune teller, you ass!"
Yusuke: "Right. Whatever you say, Adolph."
===
Goki: "I'm crushing your head."
Kurama: "Aww, isn't that cute? Goki made a friend."
Hiei: "Yes. I, too, remember when I killed my first friend. Come along, Goki. Put that thing down. Good boy. Now let's go, before they find out we're here."
Kurama: "Yes, I'm sure that alarm's for some other intruder."
Hiei: "Shut up, Kurama."
===
Yusuke: "Argh. Dammit, school's so boring! Makes me almost wish that stupid hippie was here!"
Koemna: "Like, dude! I need your help!"
Yusuke: "I said 'almost'."
===
Kurama: "I enjoy abusing my power as much the next guy, but that seemed pointless."
Hiei: "Your point?"
===
Yusuke: "That's the last time I play soccer in the street... What the hell?!"
Narrator: "And so, we meet Yusuke Urameshi, the hero of this story. But oddly enough, he's dead."
Yusuke: "Where the hell is that voice coming from? And why am I flying? Man, that's the last time I accept Kool-Aid from my art teacher."
Narrator: "Shut up! I'm trying to talk here!"
Yusuke: "No, you shut up! I'm on the worst acid trip of my life, and your stupid talking isn't helping!"
===
Paramedic #1: "Alright, people, get out of the way! Train dextrist comin' through."
(the paramedic checks out Yusuke's body)
Paramedic #1: "Let's see here... he's dead. Next?"
Paramedic #2: "Don't worry, sir, this one's fine."
The little boy who's ball Yusuke was stealing (or, if you go by the original show's version, the boy Yusuke saved from being run over by a car): "I bent my woggie!"
Paramedic #1: "Huh? Oh well, my job's done then."
Yusuke: "Huh..."
Paramedic #1: "Well, tag 'im and bag him. It's almost Happy Hour!"
Paramedic #2: "Alright... Booze!"
===
Yusuke: "Hey, Hiei. You ok down there?"
Hiei: "I'm fine. Leave me alone."
Kurama: "Are you sure? We could easily rock off you."
Hiei: "I said I'm fine! Go away!"
(strained grunting noise are heard from Hiei beneath the giant boulder the fell on him)
Hiei: "Ok, get it off me."
===
Kurama: "Anyone else here laughter just now?"
Hiei: "No!"
===
Botan: "Where you at, dawg?"
Yusuke: "What are you talking about? I'm at where I'm always at... DOING YOUR F**KING DIRTY WORK!"
===
(Botan and Yusuke are talking through compact communicators)
Botan: "How far have you gotten?"
Yusuke: "Aughh, don't even ask. We've barely made it past the front door."
Botan: "Oh, you mean the Gate of Betrayal? Yeahah, that one is pretty bad."
Yusuke: "Wait, you have information on this place?"
Botan: "Yeeap."
Yusuke: "Well, why don't you help us out a bit then? Where the hell are we going?"
Botan: "Sorry, no time. Gotta go, Yusuke!"
Yusuke: "You know what Botan, you can suck my c-"
(Botan hangs up.)
Botan: "'Scuse me."
(The screen swings back to the demon city castle...)
Kurama: "I take it that didn't yield many positive results."
Yusuke: "Ya know, you think you'd get used to it after a while, but... you really don't."
===
Kuwabara: "So, uh... what are we supposed to do now?"
Genbu: "Why don't y'all step through that door, and we'll have some fun."
(Kuwabara and Yusuke open the afore-mentioned door)
Yusuke: "Anyone else getting kind of a deliverance sort of vibe?"
Genbu: "Shut up and get your ass over here."
Kuwabara: "I am now."
Hiei: "Just shut up and move."
Genbu: "Well, well, look what the cat dragged in. We don't take too kindly to your kind around here, humans."
Yusuke: "Then why the hell did you invite us in further, rather than lead us into another trap?"
(pause)
Genbu: "Shut up."
===
Kuwabara: "Does anyone want to explain to me why there's a giant talking rock?"
Hiei: "His name is Genbu, and he's possibly the only thing in this castle that's dumber than you."
===
Genbu: "Well, looks like we got ourselves a taker. Ok, I guess it's time we... Gitrdone."
(the sound of pre-recorded laughter is heard)
Hiei: "What is with that laughter? Who in their right mind would think that's funny?"
(Yusuke and Kuwabara start laughing hysterically.)
Yusuke: "He said "gitrdone!""
Kuwabara: "I think I just pissed my pants."
Kurama: "You know, I'd say I'm disappointed, but in order for that to be true, I'd have to be surprised."
===
Hiei: "Oh, boy. A Micheal Jackson joke. How original."
Yusuke: "Guess that's why he's paid the big bucks."
===
Kuwabara: "Um, are you guys sure that the fluffy red-haired guy can handle this?"
Hiei: "You fool. Do you have any idea why I brought Kurama with me? Kurama's a ruthless fighter, and he's even more cut-throat than I. I doubt that thing will even touch him."
(Genbu gets a hit off on Kurama with a specialty surprise attack)
Kurama: "Ow!"
Hiei: "Oh, son of a whore!"
===
Hiei: "Don't worry. Kurama has a plan. I can see it from the look on his face."
(Kurama holds up a splendid red rose)
Hiei: "Oh, god... dammit."
===
Yusuke: "Um, Kurama isn't moving. Are you sure he's as good a fighter as you said?"
Hiei: "Honestly... I'm not quite sure anymore."
===
Hiei: "If Kurama's laughing at that thing, then he's in more trouble than we thought."
Kurama: "No. Actually, far from it."
Genbu: "That's a lotta talk, comin' from a city-slickin'- wait a minute, this ain't right! I'm all discombobulmalated!"
Kurama: "To put it lightly, yes, yes, you are."
Genbu: "What'tch you do to me?"
Kurama: "I simply removed this. It must be the equivalent of the hypothalamus section of your brain. It manipulates all of the necessary faculties and duties-"
Kuwabara (Kurama is still talking as Kuwabara says this): "Heh heh. Doodie."
Kurama: "-of your body. In this case, the process of putting you back together."
Genbu: "Gitrdone."
(the sound of pre-recorded laughter is heard)
Hiei: "No! No more laugh track."
Genbu: "Well... this sucks more than a-"
Kurama: "If you make one more stupid comparative joke, I'm going to kill you."
(screen pauses there on Kurama. Next it goes to Genbu, pausing there. The screen returns to Kurama, then pauses on him again.)
Genbu: "Twenty dollar whore with no gag reflex."
(Kurama lashes his Rose Whip and splits the hypothalamus-like rock in two)
Genbu: "I regret everything!"
Kurama: "Gitrdone, motherf*cker."
===
Yusuke: "See? We went the whole episode without making a dickhead joke."
Kurama: "Yes, providing as much highbrow entertainment as possible is our duty."
Kuwabara: "Heih... He said "doodie" again."
Hiei: "May I please kill him now?"
===
Koenma: "Dude! What the hell just happened?!"
Blue Ogre (George): "What are you talking about, Sir?"
Koenma: "The room just changed friggin' colors, man!"
Blue Ogre (George): "Um... Sir? What are you on?"
Koenma: "I don't even know anymore, dude."

chuckroast1492's Rurouni Kenshin the Abridged Series

"Did you just run away from a girl with a wooden sword? What a pansy!"-Kaoru Kamiya from chuckroast1492's Rurouni Kenshin the Abridged Series

FMAlchemist36's FMA The Abridged Series

"Hey! You pointing your finger at us?!"-Edward
"I wouldn't brandish your trademark arm at me, Elric."-Father Cornello
"Ahh... But he was right, we did attempt a human transmutation. But we just wanted to see Mom's face again. I still remember the time she used to pick us apples, let us play God, buried Al in books... Yep, good memories."-Edward
"Why would the producers hire such poor voice actors?"-Edward
"What in the name of Lieutenant Havoc?!"-Edward
"Heh heh. Poking is fun."-Random Village Weirdo
"Wow, he does have a big chin."-Edward
"Now I'm going to add to my clichéd evil villain persona by locking you in an easily escapable cell with no guard."-Father Cornello
"That's it! I've had it with these mother fu*kin' snakes in my mother fu*king bed!"-Father Cornello
"I shouldn't have stolen the key, but I had to prove Ed wrong at the risk of tramatizing myself."-Rose
"Woaw, this girl's crazy. No point in letting her live, then."-Father Cornello
"I summon you, my mutated chicken! Despite the fact you can barely walk, I want you to rip the flesh off her skin!"-Father Cornello
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Father Cornello: "You see, Rose, these boys attempted the one crime alchemists are forbidden to do... human transmutation. And as a result, their bodies were scarred, and they're forced to find a way to bring it back. Isn't that right?"
Alphonse: "That was uncalled for."
Edward: "Yes, thanks for opening up a wound like that."
Father Cornello: "Well, enough of these psychological torture."
===
Edward: "'Know what I say; you can't find a door, then make your own!"
Alphonse: "When have you ever said that, brother?"
Edward: "Shut up, Al."
===
Father Cornello: "What the hell are you doing here?"
Lust: "Oh, I'm just here to make random appearances with some fat guy in tights, all the while hinting at a larger story that will continue to episode fifty-one."
Father Cornello: "No, what are you doing in my bedroom?"
Lust: "Wouldn't you like to know?"
===
Rose: "I shouldn't have stolen the key, but I had to prove Ed wrong at the risk of tramatizing myself."
(the wind blows away the curtain to "Cain"'s cage, revealing a pitifully existing ex-parrots' soul conglomeration)
Rose: "Cain! Just as I remember you!"
Father Cornello: "Woaw, this girl's crazy. No point in letting her live, then. I summon you, my mutated chicken! Despite the fact you can barely walk, I want you to rip the flesh off her skin!"
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Mustang: "So, boys, have you decided to take the Alchemy Exam, then?"
Alphonse: "What the f*** do you think?!"
Edward: "Sorry, Mustang. He's having his robo-period."
Alphonse: "For the last time, I'm not a f***ing robot! I'm a real boy!"
Edward: "What, like in the fanfics?"
Alphonse: "Ok, I'm a f***ing robot!"
===
Mustang: "To help you with your exam, we're gonna send you to an alchemist named Chou Tucker, the Sewing-Life Alchemist. He'll help you. And by help, I mean he'll let you use his books, but he'll offer no useful information whatsoever."
Edward: "Yeahh, that's kinda what we were expecting."
===
Edward: "Oh, dear lord. Who taught the child how to speak?"
Alphonse: "I think it was the dog."
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Absolute Boyfriend Quotes

Fushugi Yugi: A Mysterious Play Quotes

There are thousands of stories
which have come and gone.
The old, distant memories
are engraved in my heart.
I close my eyes and remember them....
-Everlasting Story, Fushigi Yugi

Silent Mobius Quotes

"I lost precious time that day. It was time that never really existed in the first place, so it be wrong to say it was lost. I know that happy times always pass the fastest. But if they stumbled somewhere time and space and were stopped, the time which passed would only be an illusion to clocks with broken springs. Even if the hands of time are set back, my time won't return. But it's not a dream! It's not even an illusion! It is a labyrinth of deformed time."-Yuki Saiko, Silent Möbius
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Chuang Tzu Quotes

"The torch of doubt and chaos is what the sage steers by."-Chuang Tzu

Georges Duhamel Quotes

"Do not trust your memory; it is a net full of holes; the most beautiful prizes slip through it."-Georges Duhamel, The Heart's Domain

"We do not know the true value of our moments until they have undergone the test of memory."-Georges Duhamel, The Heart's Domain

Marilyn Ferguson Quotes

"Fear is a question: What are you afraid of, and why? Just as the seed of health is in illness, because illness contains information, our fears are a treasure house of self-knowledge if we explore them."-Marilyn Ferguson

Henry David Thoreau Quotes

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. From the desperate city you go into the desperate country, and have to console yourself with the bravery of minks and muskrats. A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind. There is no play in them, for this comes after work. But it is a characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things." -Henry David Thoreau, Walden, chapter 1 "Economy"

Michel de Montaigne Quotes

"Memory is the receptacle and case of science: and therefore mine being so treacherous, if I know little, I cannot much complain. I know, in general, the names of the arts, and of what they treat, but nothing more. I turn over books; I do not study them. What I retain I no longer recognise as another's; 'tis only what my judgment has made its advantage of, the discourses and imaginations in which it has been instructed: the author, place, words, and other circumstances, I immediately forget; and I am so excellent at forgetting, that I no less forget my own writings and compositions than the rest. I am very often quoted to myself, and am not aware of it. Whoever should inquire of me where I had the verses and examples, that I have here huddled together, would puzzle me to tell him, and yet I have not borrowed them but from famous and known authors, not contenting myself that they were rich, if I, moreover, had them not from rich and honourable hands, where there is a concurrence of authority with reason. It is no great wonder if my book run the same fortune that other books do, if my memory lose what I have written as well as what I have read, and what I give, as well as what I receive."-Michel de Montaigne

Jim Fiebig Quotes

"If you can look back on your life with contentment, you have one of man's most precious gifts- a selective memory."-Jim Fiebig

Carl W. Buechner Quotes

"They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel."-Carl W. Buechner

Carl Gustav Jung Quotes

"Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible."-Carl Gustav Jung

Edward de Bono Quotes

"A memory is anything that happens and does not completely unhappen. The result is some trace which is left. The trace may last for a long time or it may last only for a short time. Information that comes into the brain leaves a trace in the altered behaviour of the nerve cells that form the memory surface. A landscape is a memory surface. The contours of the surface offer an accumulated memory trace of the water that has fallen upon it. The rainfall forms little rivulets which combine into streams and then into rivers. Once the pattern of drainage has been formed then it tends to become more permanent since the rain is collected into the drainage channels and tends to make them deeper. It is the rainfall that is doing the sculpting and yet it is the response of the surface to the rainfall that is organising how the rainfall will do the sculpting."-Edward de Bono, Lateral Thinking, 1970

Marcus Tullius Cicero Quotes

"It is certain that memory contains not only philosophy, but all the arts and all that appertain to the use of life." (Memoria certe non modo Philosophiam sed omnis / vitae usum, omnesque artes, una maxime continet) -Marcus Tullius Cicero, Acad., ii. 7.

John M. Barrie Quotes

"God gave us memories that we might have roses in December."-John M. Barrie

Cyril Connolly Quotes

"Our memories are card indexes consulted and then returned in disorder by authorities whom we do not control."-Cyril Connolly

"Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you."-Cyril Connolly

"Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self."-Cyril Connolly

"There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say."-Cyril Connolly

"Everything is a dangerous drug except reality, which is unendurable."-Cyril Connolly, "The Unquiet Grave", 1945

"All charming people have something to conceal, usually their total dependence on the appreciation of others."-Cyril Connolly, Enemies of Promise (1938)

"Literature is the art of writing something that will be read twice; journalism what will be read once."-Cyril Connolly, Enemies of Promise (1938)

"Those whom the Gods would destroy, they first call promising."-Cyril Connolly, Enemies of Promise (1938)

James Shirley Quotes

"The glories of our blood and state
Are shadows, not substantial things;
There is no armour against fate,
Death lays his icy hands on kings."
-James Shirley

Margaret Weis Quotes

"Is it eradicating evil? Or are we like children, left alone in the house at night, who light candle after candle to keep away the darkness. We don’t see that the darkness has a purpose – thought we may not understand it – and so, in our terror, we end up burning down the house!"-Margaret Weis, Time of the Twins

Joseph Campbell Quotes

"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us."-Joseph Campbell

Edmund Burke Quotes

"When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle." possible source for the famous quotation attributed to Burke: "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." See also Plato's quotation in topic 'apathy' -Edmund Burke, Thoughts on the Cause of Present Discontents, 1770

Jorge Luis Borges Quotes

"I cannot walk through the suburbs in the solitude of the night without thinking that the night pleases us because it suppresses idle details, just as our memory does."-Jorge Luis Borges

"A writer needs loneliness, and he gets his share of it. He needs love, and he gets shared and also unshared love. He needs friendship. In fact, he needs the universe. To be a writer is, in a sense, to be a day-dreamer - to be living a kind of double life."-Jorge Luis Borges

Mitch Albom Quotes

"Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, that’s all. You can’t see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nuture it. You hold it. You dance with it."-Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven

William Jennings Bryan Quotes

"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." -William Jennings Bryan

Robert Benchley Quotes

"When I am dead, I hope it is said,'His sins were scarlet, but his books were read'."-Robert Benchley

"Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory."-Robert Benchley

Willa Cather Quotes

"Some memories are realities, and are better than anything that can ever happen to one again."-Willa Cather, My Antonia

Vladimir Nabokov Quotes

"I think it is all a matter of love: the more you love a memory, the stronger and stranger it is."-Vladimir Nabokov, Strong Opinions

"I should allow only my heart to have imagination; and for the rest rely on memory, that long drawn sunset of one's personal truth."-Vladimir Nabokov

Rita Mae Brown Quotes

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory. -Rita Mae Brown

Stephen Paul Lather Quotes

"If Satan exists, and if he is clever at promoting Evil, then would he not agitate one section of mankind to go to war with an another - both believing God was on their side?"-Stephen Paul Lather

Buddha Quotes

"It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways."-Buddha

"Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."-Buddha

Peanuts Quotes

"I've developed a new philosophy... I only dread one day at a time." -Charles Monroe Schulz, Peanuts (character Charlie Brown)

Kirstin Brown Quotes

"Do not mistake consequence for fate." -Kirstin Brown

King of Bandits Jing Quotes

"Shining brightly, even for a split second, is better than living a dull-grey life for eternity."-Jing, King of Bandits Jing

"Tears of Sadness... Tears of Joy... They're far from the same."-Jing, King of Bandits Jing

"We humans are just made to be greedy I guess. But there are some of us who can resist the greedy temptations and desires of our hearts."-Jing, King of Bandits Jing

"Even without clocks, the sun will still rise." - Captain (King of Bandits Jing)

Noir Quotes

"A sinner once passed away will never return, but sins will never vanish and the love will never die." - Les Soldats (Noir)

X Japan Quotes

"Stab the dolls filled with hate. Wash yourself in their blood."- Art of Life XJapan

Hell Girl Quotes

"I shall ferry the soul of your tormentors straight into the depths of Hell..." -Ai Enma, Hell Girl

Terry Pratchett Quotes

"He was the sort of person who stood on mountaintops during thunderstorms in wet copper armour shouting "All the Gods are bastards.""-Terry Pratchett

Case Closed Quotes

"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." - Various Characters, Case Closed (Detective Conan)

The Melody of Oblivion Quotes

"I hate the ocean, which seems so happy but ignores me! I hate the clouds, which seem so happy but ignores me! I hate this blue sky, which seems so happy but ignores me!"-Keiko, The Melody of Oblivion

Samurai Champloo Quotes

"Is there a need for a reason to kill someone?"-Mugen, Samurai Champloo

Serial Experiments Lain Quotes

"No matter where you are... Everyone is always connected."-Lain from Serial Experiments Lain

Neon Genesis Evangelion Quotes

"If you're going to do it, do it now. If not, then leave."-Gendo Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion

"Man fears the darkness, and so he scrapes away at the edges of it with fire."-Rei Ayanami, Neon Genesis Evangelion

"Survivability takes priority."-Misato Katsuragi, Neon Genesis Evangelion

"Mankind has no time left."-Gendo Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion

"The interaction of men and women isn't very logical."-Dr. Ritsuko Akagi, Neon Genesis Evangelion

"You're thinking in Japanese. If you must think, do it in German!"-Asuka, Neon Genesis Evangelion

Mobile Suit Gundam Quotes

"A mix of people and light...they're all MELTING!"-Amuro Ray, Gundam

"I came to laugh at you!" - Chars Aznabal from Gundam (the original)

Bergen Evans Quotes

"Freedom of speech and freedom of action are meaningless without freedom to think. And there is no freedom of thought without doubt." -Bergen Evans

Albert Einstein Quotes

"The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it."- Albert Einstein

"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen."- Albert Einstein

"If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts."- Albert Einstein

"As far as I'm concerned, I prefer silent vice to ostentatious virtue."- Albert Einstein

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."– Albert Einstein

"No, this trick won't work… how on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a phenomenon as first love?"– Albert Einstein

John Irving Quotes

"Your memory is a monster; you forget - it doesn't. It simply files things away. It keeps things for you, or hides things from you - and summons them to your recall with a will of its own. You think you have a memory; but it has you!"-John Irving

Proverbs

"If fortune smiles, who doesn't? If fortune doesn't, who does?" - Chinese Proverb
"Luck never gives; it only lends." - Swedish Proverb

"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book." - Irish Proverb

"A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control." - Proverbs 29:11

"Kindle not a fire that you cannot extinguish." - Proverb

"He that would have fire must bear with smoke." - Dutch Proverb

"Visits always give pleasure - if not the arrival, the departure."- Portuguese proverb

"One who asks a question is a fool for five minutes. One who does not ask a question remains a fool forever." - Chinese proverb

Shakespeare Quotes

"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt." -William Shakespeare, "Measure for Measure", Act 1 scene 4

"And where two raging fires meet together, they do consume the thing that feeds their fury; though little fire grows great with little wind, yet extreme gusts will blow out fire and all.."-William Shakespeare

"Beauty provoketh thieves sooner than gold."- William Shakespeare

Final Fantasy Quotes

"People who want happy endings have to write their own." - Paine from Final Fantasy X-2

Dragonball Saga Quotes

"So he killed my father and murdered my people. That means nothing to me. Strength is the only thing that matters in this world. Everything else is just a delusion for the weak."-Vegeta, Dragonball Z

"I am the hope of the universe. I am the answer to all living things that cry out for peace. I am protector of the innocent, I am the light in the darkness, I am truth. Ally to good! Nightmare to you!"-Goku, Dragonball Z

"I'm glad to see that Frieza will be destroyed by his worst fear... a Super Saiyan."-Vegeta

"He's just a corpse and he's still blabbing. I'll have to gag him to shut him up."-Frieza

"I can't change who I am, not on the battlefield, my feelings are my guide."-Goku

"Tell me, is it slavery if you get what you want?"-Vegeta, Dragonball Z

"We worked so hard for him. We did everything he asked of us and more... He took me from my father when I was just a little boy. He made me do whatever he wanted, and said he would kill my father if he didn't. I did everything he asked, but he killed him anyway, along with everyone else. He was scared of us... scared that a Super Saiyan would be born, to rise up and over-throw him."-Vegeta, Dragonball Z

"Kakarot...please...destroy Frieza... He made me what I am. Don't...let him...do it...to anyone else... Whatever it takes...stop him...please..."-Vegeta, Dragonball Z

"Goodbye Vegeta. You're not as cold-hearted as you believed yourself to be. A heart of stone can't shed tears the way you did. You must've been holding them back your whole life... I'm the only one left. I think I understand you now. You weren't grieving over your own death, or because our home planet was destroyed. You were grieving because he turned you into what he wanted you to be. You never had a chance to be anything else. Well, I still respect you. I know you made a lot of mistakes, but now I see that they weren't all your fault. You had the firey will of a Saiyan."-Goku, Dragonball Z

"What is this, a class reunion of evil losers?"-Vegeta, Dragonball GT

"Three weeks to catch a monkey?"-Piccollo, Dragonball Z

"Do your best Trunks! Wait... Trunks' best might hurt someone. Do okay!"-Krillin, Dragonball Z

"Did he say Goku? How dare you mention that name to the Prince of Saiyans! I am the leader and sole protector of the planet Earth! And that Kakorat is a clown who knows only his stomach and his own stupidity. I came to do this job, and I'm not leaving until I finish it!"-Vegeta, Dragonball GT

"Saiyan blood still courses through my veins, and I call the Earth my home!"-Vegeta, Dragonball GT

"It's safe to say Vegeta and the other Z-Fighters have qualified for the tournament, in addition to destroying a punching machine, a dozen cameras, and the speaking ability of a couple hundred fighters." Dragonball Z

"What's a bath?"-Goku, Dragonball

"There are no short heroes, only sidekicks."-Chi Chi, Dragonball

"Incredible! How did you make your clothes grow?"-Goku, Dragonball

"You have a weakness! Everything does!"-Goku, Dragon Ball Z Movie 13: Wrath of the Dragon

=__Dragonball Z__=
Frieza: "What are you?"
Goku: "I am the hope of the universe. I am the answer to all living things that cry out for peace. I am protector of the innocent, I am the light in the darkness, I am truth. Ally to good! Nightmare to you!"
====
Goku: "You're just a beast, with no consence."
Frieza: (laughs maliciously) "So I'm a beast, huh?
Goku: "Hmph."
Frieza:
====
Frieza: "Why do you loathe what I've done so much? Saiyans are just as ruthless as I am. They were killers, all of them. And you have the gall to condemn what I've done? You and your bloodthirsty race!"
Goku: "They paid for their mistakes."
Frieza: "Is that why they died? I thought it was because I killed them."
====
Frieza: "Nice move, but your shoe came untied."
Goku: "I'm not going to fall for that, I don't even have shoelaces."
Frieza: "Darn, I guess you're a little smarter than the average Saiyan."
====
Doctor Briefs: "
Kitty:
Chi Chi: "
====
Goku: "Wow, I'm so full! If I have to fight one of you guys please don't punch me in the gut!"
(Short Timeskip)
18: "Hey, we should go check the draw. See who we're fighting."
Vegeta: "If I'm fighting Kakarrot in the initial round, the first thing I'm going to do is punch him in the gut."
====
Tournament Host: Next up is, #18. Is #18 your real name?
18: My father is pretty dull.
(draws)
18: Here, now I'm number 9.
====
Dende:
Krillin: "No wonder you're green."
====
(Trunks and Goten are talking about what they'd buy when they won.)
Trunks: I guess I'd just buy you a better looking hair cut.
Goten: Hair what?
====
Broly: "Why don't you give up?"
Goku: "I never really learned how to."
====
----DBZ Sub----
Krillin: Oh please god, don't let me fight against any of these guys... oh please god... *in a praying position*

Piccolo: *smirking* But Krillin, why do you pray? You already know that Dende is god anyway.

Krillin: Oh, that's right.. you hear me Dende, good buddy? Please don't let me fight against any of my friends.
====

=__Dragonball GT__=
Doctor Juiro: "Long time, no see, Vegeta."
Vegeta: "What is this, a class reunion of evil losers?"
====
Vegeta: "What do you want?"
Doctor Juiro: "Just the usual genocide and extintion of your entire race and people."
====
Vegeta: "Did he say Goku? How dare you mention that name to the Prince of Saiyans! I am the leader and sole protector of the planet Earth! And that Kakorat is a clown who knows only his stomach and his own stupidity. I came to do this job, and I'm not leaving until I finish it!"
Docter Mew: "You've aged so much, Vegeta. And the limitations of your flesh is no match for us. It digusts me to listen to the Prince of Saiyans say he'll protect the Earth. Your race is of no use, and you have lost the pride you once stood for."
Vegeta: "Saiyan blood still courses through my veins, and I call the Earth my home!"
====
Super 17: I must admire your ability to stand up after that.
Vegeta: And I admire your ability to DIE!
====

Slayers Quotes

"Don't tell me he wants to conquer the world? Can't he come up with something more original?" - Lina Inverse from Slayers

Ghost in the Shell Quotes

"Straighten your own act before whining about the world. If thats too much close your eyes, cover your ears, zip your mouth and live in a cave..or the alternative." -Ghost in the Shell:SAC-EP01

Kingdom Hearts Quotes

"You'll forget me, but that's just the the links of the chain of memories coming undone, I want to believe...that our chain of memories will be connected again someday."- Namine from Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories

.hack//sign Quotes

"If you want to know the truth, you must have the courage to accept it." - Bear from .hack//sign

Anime Movies

"You cannot change your fate; however, you can rise to meet it."-(Princess Mononoke)

"Are you selling soup or donkey piss?"- the "monk" Jigo, Princess Mononoke

"Men are born half-dead, and it takes a lifetime for them to become completely dead."- Kawasaki from the movie Ooru naito rongu 3: Saishuu-shô

Quote Collection Index Key

Quote Collection Coding Index

=====
(insert quote here)
===== means) the quote inbetween is a multiple person quote, not just a one person line

**~**
(insert quote here)
{picture and/or movement shown on screen}
(and/or insert quote here)
**~** means) Um... I can't think of how to explain it right now, so use your own logical deduction skills on this one.

''(quote)'' means) the full quote isn't there, just part of it

(name):''(quote or partial quote) means) it's a multi-person quote, and not the whole thing is there

++(word)++ means) ++I need to correct the spelling of the word in here

-(wo;r;d)- means) the word, but with ;proper symbol-letter thing;, needs to be put here

%name% means) the character's name is still needed

%name*% means) the character's name is still needed, but I'm not sure if it was ever mentioned at all

"(quote with %name% inside)" or ''(quote with %name% inside)'' means) the character's name is still needed, but I either forgot it, couldn't understand what the exact name being said was, or just can't spell it for all the tea leaves in China

(quote)**(=*) means) the quote was not copied word-for-word, so I need to look it up for the EXACT version

(quote) (personal opinion/comment in green) means) well, it just means I had something to say, so I did


mmmm....
THIS is my Symbol-Letter/Character Index - it's use and reasons are obvious:
Á My most common uses for this symbol:
á My most common uses for this symbol:
À My most common uses for this symbol:
à My most common uses for this symbol:
Ă My most common uses for this symbol:
ă My most common uses for this symbol:
 My most common uses for this symbol:
â My most common uses for this symbol:
Å My most common uses for this symbol:
å My most common uses for this symbol:
Ǻ My most common uses for this symbol:
ǻ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ä My most common uses for this symbol:
ä My most common uses for this symbol:
à My most common uses for this symbol:
ã Ąą Āā Ǽǽ Ćć Ĉĉ Č
č My most common uses for this symbol:
Ċ My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ç My most common uses for this symbol:
ç My most common uses for this symbol:
Ď My most common uses for this symbol:
ď My most common uses for this symbol:
Đ My most common uses for this symbol:
đ My most common uses for this symbol:
É My most common uses for this symbol:
é My most common uses for this symbol: cliché, fiancée, naivé
È My most common uses for this symbol:
è My most common uses for this symbol:
Ĕ My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ê My most common uses for this symbol:
ê My most common uses for this symbol:
Ě My most common uses for this symbol:
ě My most common uses for this symbol:
Ë My most common uses for this symbol:
ë My most common uses for this symbol:
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ė My most common uses for this symbol:
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ę My most common uses for this symbol:
Ē My most common uses for this symbol:
ē My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ğ My most common uses for this symbol:
ğ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ĝ My most common uses for this symbol:
ĝ My most common uses for this symbol:
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ģ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ĥ My most common uses for this symbol:
ĥ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ħ My most common uses for this symbol:
ħ My most common uses for this symbol:
ÍMy most common uses for this symbol:
í My most common uses for this symbol:
Ì My most common uses for this symbol:
ì My most common uses for this symbol:
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î My most common uses for this symbol:
Ï My most common uses for this symbol:
ï My most common uses for this symbol:
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İ My most common uses for this symbol:
i My most common uses for this symbol:
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ī My most common uses for this symbol:
ı My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ĺ My most common uses for this symbol:
ĺ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ľ My most common uses for this symbol:
ľ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ļ My most common uses for this symbol:
ļ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ł My most common uses for this symbol:
ł My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŀ My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ń My most common uses for this symbol:
ń My most common uses for this symbol:
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ň My most common uses for this symbol:
Ñ My most common uses for this symbol:
ñ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ņ My most common uses for this symbol:
ņ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ó My most common uses for this symbol:
ó My most common uses for this symbol:
Ò My most common uses for this symbol:
ò My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŏ My most common uses for this symbol:
ŏ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ô My most common uses for this symbol:
ô My most common uses for this symbol:
Ö My most common uses for this symbol:
ö My most common uses for this symbol: Silent Möbius
Ő My most common uses for this symbol:
ő My most common uses for this symbol:
Õ My most common uses for this symbol:
õ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ø My most common uses for this symbol:
ø My most common uses for this symbol:
Ǿ My most common uses for this symbol:
ǿ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ō My most common uses for this symbol:
ō My most common uses for this symbol: Zanpakutō
Ŕ My most common uses for this symbol:
ŕ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ř My most common uses for this symbol:
ř My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŗ My most common uses for this symbol:
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ś My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŝ My most common uses for this symbol:
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ş My most common uses for this symbol:
Ť My most common uses for this symbol:
ť My most common uses for this symbol:
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ţ My most common uses for this symbol:
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Ú My most common uses for this symbol:
ú My most common uses for this symbol:
Ù My most common uses for this symbol:
ù My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŭ My most common uses for this symbol:
ŭ My most common uses for this symbol:
Û My most common uses for this symbol:
û My most common uses for this symbol: Yû Watase
Ů My most common uses for this symbol:
ů My most common uses for this symbol:
Ü My most common uses for this symbol:
ü My most common uses for this symbol:
Ű My most common uses for this symbol:
ű My most common uses for this symbol:
Ũ My most common uses for this symbol:
ũ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ų My most common uses for this symbol:
ų My most common uses for this symbol:
Ū My most common uses for this symbol:
ū My most common uses for this symbol:
Ẃ My most common uses for this symbol:
ẃ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ẁ My most common uses for this symbol:
ẁ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŵ My most common uses for this symbol:
ŵ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ẅ My most common uses for this symbol:
ẅ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ý My most common uses for this symbol:
ý My most common uses for this symbol:
Ỳ My most common uses for this symbol:
ỳ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ŷ My most common uses for this symbol:
ŷ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ÿ My most common uses for this symbol:
ÿ My most common uses for this symbol:
Ź My most common uses for this symbol:
ź My most common uses for this symbol:
Ž My most common uses for this symbol:
ž My most common uses for this symbol:
Ż My most common uses for this symbol:
ż My most common uses for this symbol:
™

Team Dattebayo's Death Note - The Abridged Series! Quotes

Team Dattebayo's Death Note - The Abridged Series!

===
Light: "Ga-aayyy."
L: "Oh, I'm gay? Why don't you try spelling your last backwards."
Light: "Hm. Yagami... "Im a ga-" Oh, you son of a bitch."
===

ryjacork's Rurouni Kenshin Abridged Series Quotes

"Kenshin, help me! Kaoru's out of her f***ing mind!"-Yahiko
"Right. Well, scintilating as always, I'm going out to get some tofu for dinner."-Kenshin
"Holy s*** in a banana peel!"-Yahiko
"Yes, wait, I recognize you now. The two annoying little hairs hanging down in front of your face, the thrusting attack with your sword, the fact that you're one of the only people in this series who decides to wear pants; You're Hajime Saito!"-Sensei
"Why did Darkwing Duck just attack Chuck Norris?"-Yahiko
"Ok, buddy, here's the deal; I'm gonna ask you some questions. I don't like what I hear, Sano over here's gonna get the answers. Now, I'm not quite sure how he's gonna get the answers, but let's look at him for a minute. Now if you'll notice, he's making a fist. That'll probably be our first clue. Now, what he intends to do with that fist, I'm not sure. Maybe he's gonna punch you in the face, maybe punch you in the stomache, maybe he'll... cover it with oil, then shove it elbow-deep up your ass. I'm gonna be honest with you, I have no idea what this man is capable of, although I have had my suspicions that he plays for that team. So, what's it gonna be?"-Kenshin
""-
""-
""-
""-
""-
""-
===
Kaoru: "Why are you going out for tofu, Kenshin? We have plenty of stuff to eat here."
Kenshin: "Because if I buy it out there, I know it hasn't been spiked with anything!"
===
===
===
===
Sanosuke: "I recognize that man in the beard too. That was my old teacher, Sensei."
Yahiko: "Wait, his name was Sensei?"
Sanosuke: "Yeah, so? Who cares?"
Yahiko: "So... that would make his teachin title 'Sensei-sensei'?"
===
===
===

Arufonsa1 and MidnightDevont's Fullmetal Abridged Quotes

"There's no proper way to make fun of a child seeing a mutated deformed corpse of his mother after being dismembered."-Edward {I had to add the "a" before mutated deformed corpse}
"These people are all completely retarded."-Alphonse
"You explain to me why you felt it was necessary to shoot a 10 year old boy in the head, and kill him, while his back was turned. I mean, dude, I don't care what god you worship, that's a straight-to-hell pass right there."-Alphonse
"How did that guy get unconscious?"-Edward
"What kind of leader would use religion to further his own own political needs?"-Edward
"Damn you, Ed! You killed me again!"-Alphonse
"Damn, how many Pokemon references are going to show up in an abridged series?"-Edward
"You have blond hair, and your right arm is metal, with a long red coat. You're... you're... the 60 Billion Double Dollar Man, Vash the Stampede!"-Father Cornello
"Beating up a fat old guy sounds like fun."-Alphonse
"My gonads! My precious gonads..."-Edward
"Now that I have taken your watch, we shall make a contract together, and your soul will be bound to mine. And then we meet a romantic end."-Father Cornello
"Dude, that was pretty screwed up. Why the hell did he make me call him 'The Bandit'?"-Edward
"Oh, wow, you came to abuse me and squeeze hot wet information from my muscles."-Edward
"Damn yaoi fan-girls."-Father Cornello
"I've been hit on by this blonde metal midget!"-Rose
"Goodbye, Smokey. I'm afraid you found out... too much."-Father Cornello
"Damn it! Why did I eat all those Krispy Kreme doughnuts?!"-Father Cornello
"Give it up, Priest. This is the last time religion will be used to take advantage of people and exhaust them of their money and hope."-Edward
"Now, to completely emasculate my brother in front of millions!"-Edward
"No... you mean the show has to continue? It's not fair! It's not fair!"-Edward
"Sleep with your eyes open tonight, Ed. Sleep with them open."-Alphonse
===
Alphonse: "Hey. Weren't we supposed'ta open with some character origin flashback?"
Edward: "Yeah, but there's no proper way to make fun of a child seeing a mutated deformed corpse of his mother after being dismembered."
Alphonse: "Oh, hell, I could thinka something. But it would involve a chainsaw. Or maybe a meat grinder. And a blender... with a bag of nachos."
(Ed spits out the... thing, he was drinking)
{I had to add the "a" before mutated deformed corpse}
===
Edward: "Wow, that girl has a nice ass. Hey, Al, why don't you- oh, right, you're a eunuch, you won't notice."
Alphonse: "I hate you so much."
===
Alphonse: "These people are all completely retarded."
Edward: "You're right, Al. Maybe it is a miracle if he's forgetting the laws of alchemy."
Alphonse: "I didn't say that."
Edward: "I think so, too. We should investigate this more thoroughly to impress that girl with the nice ass."
Alphonse: "What are you talking about?"
Edward: "You're saying you'll pay for a room at a hotel and stay outside in the cold as I have uncontrolled wild passionate sex with a hot woman, while you look at the ground, cursing God for your fate that was dealt to you and wishing that you had proper organs to enjoy a woman's company like I can?"
Alphonse: "I'll say it again; I hate you so much."
===
Edward: "I was reading this book 'Makeout Paradise.'"
Rose: "You shouldn't speak so blasphemis in a church that isn't-"
(gunshot noise)
Rose: "Holy mother fucking bitch, what was that?!"
===
Krai: "I killed him in the name of God. And now I will do the same to you."
Alphonse: "You bastard! You shot me!"
Krai: "Holy crap, a talking suit of armor!"
Alphonse: "No, no. We are not going on about that. You explain to me why you felt it was necessary to shoot a 10 year old boy in the head, and kill him, while his back was turned. I mean, dude, I don't care what god you worship, that's a straight-to-hell pass right there."
===
Edward: "Hey, how did that guy get unconscious?"
Alphonse: "I showed him what was under my loincloth."
===
Father Cornello: "Pidget, I choose you!"
Edward: "Damn, how many Pokemon references are going to show up in an abridged series?"
===
Father Cornello: "You have blond hair, and your right arm is metal, with a long red coat. You're... you're... the 60 Billion Double Dollar Man, Vash the Stampede!"
Edward: "I'm the Full Metal Alchemist, Edward Elric, you R-tard."
===
Edward: "Hey, Al, how did you get out of the sand?"
Alphonse: "Umm... plot device?"
Edward: "Works for me. Let's go kick some ass."
===
Edward: "Let's go kick some ass."
Alphonse: "Yeah, beating up a fat old guy sounds like fun."
===
Father Cornello: "Now that I have taken your watch, we shall make a contract together, and your soul will be bound to mine. And then we meet a romantic end, but beautiful in each other's arms."
Edward: "Okay... That's just gross."
===
Edward: "You're pretty smart to get an army of religious drones that will follow your every whim."
Father Cornello: "I don't care about all that. I'm just using my power to take advantage of women who have lost loved ones and are in a vulnerable position. It makes them open to suggestions. So I use that to have sex with them in a very uncomfortable place."
Edward: "What, like the back of a Volkswagon?"
Father Cornello: "No. More like- hey, is that a microphone? Oh, fudge monkey."
===
Edward: "Time to give it up, Priest. This is the last time religion will be used to take advantage of people and exhaust them of their money and hope."
Alphonse: "Yeah, right. Not in this anime."
===
Edward: "Now, to completely emasculate my brother in front of millions!"
Alphonse: "I hate you, Ed."
===
Edward: "What's that, Al? You think we should return my body normal first because my automail is a total burden, even though it gets me so many hot chicks? Thanks, Al."
Alphonse: "Sleep with your eyes open tonight, Ed. Sleep with them open."